Top 5 – “America, Fuck Yeah!” Movies
Happy Fourth of July, folks! In honor of our great nation’s birthday, I am going to countdown the best movies that make us scream, “America, Fuck yeah!”. These aren’t the best movies about America or the best movies about great moments in American history. No, these are the movies that are the equivalent to the explosive fireworks we watch on this day. These are the movies that you watch while eating a gluttonous amount of food while chugging cheap beer and crushing the cans on our foreheads. These are the best, “America, Fuck Yeah!” movies.
5 – TEAM AMERICA: WORLD POLICE (Trey Parker & Matt Stone, 2004)
The movie that literally invented the title of this Top 5, Team America: World Police is as American as movies get. Trey Parker and Matt Stone used puppets to represent all the awesomeness of America. This movie is a literal firework finale in one movie. Constant explosions, guns, chases, all set in front of national landmarks make this movie a wildly entertaining and ridiculous good time. It’s rude, crude, and hilarious, yet has the timely message of stepping up for your country and your team when needed. Oh, and it has muppet coitus, which is just comedy gold. Put on your American flag jumpsuit, grab a 24 pack, and binge drink to the catchy songs and explosions.
4 – LIVE FREE OR DIE HARD (Len Wiseman, 2007)
With every Die Hard film comes a bigger problem for John McClane (Bruce Willis). The first film, he saves an office building, the second film he saves an airport, and in the third film, he saves New York City. But nothing was as big as the task McClane had in his fourth installment: Saving the United States of America. Teamed with an online hacker (a terrific Justin Long), the two must stop a group of cyber terrorists from eliminating all of America’s natural resources. In typical McClane form, bodies fall, cars crash, and buildings crumble, all within a barrage of explosions. This movie is absolutely insane and rides on pure adrenalin, peaking with McClane riding the back of an exploding jet, which is as awesome as movie scenes get. John McClane is an all-American hero and has always the “little guy” taking down the “big guy” and nothing was bigger than when he saved the U.S.A.
3 – AIR FORCE ONE (Wolfgang Peterson, 1997)
What happens when the leader of the free world is taken hostage by terrorists thousands of feet in the air? When you have President James Marshall (Harrison Ford, at his most badass) on board, a whole lot of ass-kicking is what. Marshall goes around taking out each terrorist one by one until they are all dead and off of his plane. If the plot of Air Force One actually happened to any modern President, none of them would have stood a chance (I think Teddy Roosevelt would have been fine, but he was in office about 50 years before Air Force One existed). Instead, James Marshall runs through them like nothing. He is the President we need, but not the one we deserve.
2 – ROCKY IV (Sylvester Stallone, 1985)
Rocky Balboa is an America icon. He’s the definition of the American dream. He’s the underdog that went up against the world champ and went the distance. The first Rocky (1976) is a great American movie, but not one I would say screams, “Fuck yeah!” That right goes to Rocky IV, where Rocky Balboa single-handedly ended the Cold War. Russian boxer Ivan Drago (an awesome Dolph Lundgren) is the most feared boxer in the world, running through his opponents like nothing. When he kills Apollo Creed (Carl Weathers) during a match, Rocky finds it in himself to take on the Russian killing machine for America and for Apollo. Rocky, donning the American flag shorts, gets in a thrilling, bloody battle with Drago, only to knock him out in the final round. It was not only a victory for Rocky and his family, but one for America.
1 – INDEPENDENCE DAY (Roland Emmerich, 1996)
A lot of holiday’s have inspired movie titles. Halloween (1978), A Christmas Story (1983), Valentine’s Day (2010) all represent their respective holidays and Independence Day has the honor of representing America’s birthday and boy, does it represent it. When aliens begin to invade earth, everyone must come together to stop this invasion before Earth no longer exists. America may figure out how to stop the aliens, but that’s not what makes this movie the best In arguably the biggest, “Fuck yeah!” moment in movie history, President Whitmore (Bill Pullman, in a career-best performance) gives a rousing speech about mankind, humanity, and coming together for freedom. Even 20 years later, this iconic speech still gets out hearts racing, blood pumping, and has us screaming, “AMERICA!!” at the top of our lungs. I watch this movie every single July 4th and plan on continuing this tradition until I die, which is why this is the best “America, Fuck yeah!” movie.
What movies make you scream, “America, fuck yeah!”? Comment below or hit me up on Twitter and Instagram, @kevflix, or on Facebook by searching Kevflix.